Learn To Be Lonely (And Not Busy) Part 3
This will be the last one (for now) about how to be alone and happy. We have covered getting to know yourself (and the swings) and slowing (waaaay) down. Lastly, I want to tell you how to actually like yourself.
I've done a fat girl post in which I talked about my weight issues. I've talked about my depression. I've gone on and on about how I have to be so organized. There are a lot of reasons to not like me, and I know that. I'm judgmental, rude, and have no BS tolerance. I have a lot of issues that make me a bad employee (I have lost jobs over them). I know about these things and so often I don't like myself.
But I KNOW about them. This is a strength. Like what we did in the first blog, where you found your moods, triggers, and got to know yourself--you need to know these things about yourself too. Acknowledge when you have a toxic trait. I say this because I know so many girls who think they are tough or bad ass but are really just bitches. And that's not cool. You can be strong and nice at the same time.
When you know your toxic traits, you can control them. Make note, make a change. Stop and choose to do something else instead. If you can admit you have a toxic trait, you can change it (or at least soften it) and you will start to like yourself. But more than this, find the good traits. Mine are not super cool or anything, but they are mine and I like them. I'm really creative for myself and my living space. I don't put a lot out there creative-wise aside from stories (which I love!) but I do for myself. I've gotten real creative with living space decorations to lift my mood. I am also easy going (but anxious too--it's a Jekyll and Hyde thing) and adaptable. I am literally Darwin from X-Men. I love that about myself. I am extremely loyal and caring. I'm a scorpio and I hear they are fierce when it comes to loyalty. Turns out it's true.
It sounds like I'm patting myself on the back because I am! I am lonely, someones gotta do it! Do it for yourself too. Then why spend so much time talking about my toxic traits? Because you have to understand yourself or you'll just come off as a prideful dumb bum. Which makes your toxic traits waaaay worse and adds to them. I promise, if you can find and acknowledge what you need to control abou yourself, your good traits will show themselves to you. And don't ignore them. Greet them, hug them, and work on them too. You have some cool features: find them!
Also, laugh really loud when things are funny. I guffaw all the time at my phone when I'm alone and I see a meme I like. Smile at the funny puppy video. Let yourself feel the positive emotions. Restricting your emotions is super unhealthy.
Good luck, pirates. You'll enjoy liking yourself and I hope you also enjoy all your alone time!